Friday, August 5, 2011

Changes

A lot has changed since our last post.

I ended up asking to have Slim and Homeboy moved to other foster homes. Having four little ones under 2 proved to be too much for me. For me it got to the point that I had to choose between my sanity and caring for our two permanent little ones or living life TOO crazy and having all four.

Disruptions are never easy. Slim's caseworker was very supportive. Homeboy's was for the most part - but the Supervisor was not thrilled. She even went as far as to be pretty cruel to my face about it and imply that I didn't care about him. She also stated that she wanted him evaluated again because she felt that he was NOT delayed... at all. Um, hello - two year old with one word and three seperate professionals have decided he is severely speech delayed and mildly cognitively delayed. And yes, he would be having therapies a minimum of 3 times a week, in-home. Grr.

So for now we are not accepting any new placements. And I kind of feel like it will stay that way for at least a year or two. I want to focus on our two boys and take care of our family. Sometimes when we get so super involved with something, albeit noble or worthy, other areas of our life suffer.

Tank is still with us. And will be. Forever. Well, fingers crossed of course.

His birth mom contested the severance and now we will go to Trial sometime in the next few months. She doesn't have a chance, but it doesn't make it any easier. She has missed every visit since she contested and hasn't seen her son in a month. Before the severance hearing we had a chance to talk to her and she seemed to be at peace with the adoption and all that would happen. We assured her that we do want a semi-open adoption and that she would continue to be able to see her son in his life. We haven't nailed out the particulars but we are thinking of letters and pictures a few times a year and a minimum of an annual visit. We also want to have an open relationship with other extended family members.

And did I mention they found his birth father? You know, the one they are in the middle of publishing on? The one they haven't even heard of or known where he was for the past 8 months. Ugh. We'll see what he does. I am not too nervous about that. Hopefully he can see what is best for Tank and be willing to relinquish.

So that's our life. Less chaos. More happiness. Still waiting.

1 comment:

  1. Don't let anyone give you a guilt trip. You did the best you could do for them while you had them. I'm sure they will be fine in their new homes. You recognized what was best for everyone and made it happen. Enjoy your boys and your sanity ;)

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